A Day Of Peace

It has been a long time since I wrote my last blog. It seems words flow freely in times of great turmoil or peace. For previously when I used to write, it was my uncertainty about my future that spoke out and now being back at home after a long time, feeling the same old sense of belonging to a place made me revisit my past writing days. It has been days since I felt the peace of mind without any haste of the world. Well it had to have an effect on me.

So here I am again.

It seems only yesterday I left for joining in an IT company to a place totally different then what I am used to. It seems that time has flown, changing many things, most of all, me. Yet sitting in my home writing this blog it feels nothing has altered since last year when I left Delhi. But my heart knows that it has.

It has been the most important year in my life so far. For it was my time with the outside world (as it is called), without the guidance and help of my friends and family. It was a year of reckoning where I have to prove my worth.

I did okay, I think (Hope I am correct!).

I meet with people entirely different than me and I learnt a great deal from all of them. It opened my eyes to how much I still need to learn. I made some great friendships along the way. It warmed my heart to know people who were born and bought-up completely different from what I was.  I understand now that under the differences we all are actually the same inside.

I hope my new friends will go a long way with me.  

I sit and look back all the time that has passed since I left Delhi for Bangalore and I say to everyone there is no place like home. It always feels comfortable and secure no matter what. The very air seems so refreshing and pure (Thanks to godsend rain). I was telling a friend that I like Delhi more compared to Bangalore when I got an amazing reply “You don’t like the place, you like the people in it”. This pretty much sums it all.

What my friend implied and with which I concur is a fact that I have in Delhi some special friends and family that make my life meaningful and who I treasure above everything. For life without these special people will be dull and gloomy indeed. So to see them again after so many months gives me the will and strength to carry on. With these people, a year is not enough for talking till my heart’s fill and a moment is sufficient to look at them and understand that our bond is strong as ever.

It’s good to be back. After a long time it finally feels like home.

Today life is good. 

Cheers!!

Live From Hyderabad

It has been a long time since I wrote my blog. There is a saying that time never stops. Yet there are periods in life when it actually does. When nothing seems to happen for us, everything seems to be standing still except the date on the calendar. There is an emptiness which seems to be surrounding us, feeding on us. At such time all we can do is endure and hope for the days to get better. I was having a similar phase. But I’m happy to say that time is past.

So my first job, a new city and lots and lots of new people. It has been a great experience so far (best biriyani ever). Being a guy who has lived in Delhi for last 16 years, coming to live in the City of Nizams seemed a daunting task. When you enter the city the first impression is of a place with a rich and glorious history. It has been the main city for the Mughals and later the capital for the British. It seems a whole new world for me who has living a comfortable yet incomplete life so far.

The most striking feature in this new phase of life is my new found association with the people from different parts of India, speaking different languages, coming from different geographical origins and ethnicity. Another important aspect is beginning of my professional career in IT industry. It is the initial phase of my personal transformation that would leave me changed for the better.

Each one of us has dreamed to be successful in life. It takes our whole life to realize it. I have leaped to the next level and find myself closer to the future that I have always wanted for myself. I must confess here that it is not the path that I thought I would likely walk, yet I have learnt that life does not give you what you want rather life gives what you need. Perhaps I needed this one.

A Day Of Light

The light of all lights that shines brighter than the sun, more eternal than eternity, more human than humanity, existing for the sake of its existence, transforming continuously yet hidden in its every form, a truth more true than life itself. It has been named thousand names, a thousand times. It has been called Faith by the devout, bond-of-blood by the radical, love by dreamers and friendship by the wise.

I see around myself a world which consumes everything, ever changing its nature, and my sense of being insignificant in grand scheme of things becomes more profound. I realise no matter what you do, something or other would always be left out, beyond your reach. It is then of paramount importance that a force must exist which fills the void and gives you strength to carry on. This force has been hailed for generations as faith, love and friendship.

   

It is perhaps a paradox of nature that nothing or no one could exist in this world on his own. To think you could exist without your friends or your loved ones is unimaginable. I always put friends before family for friends are living examples of choices which you have made in this world. People who have witnessed your life, wept for your hardships, cared for your well being and whose mere presence gives you strength and all of these being reciprocated by you, is a boon greater than all the riches of the world.

            

I think of all this and conclude that there is something at work here, more fundamental than any building blocks of life, which works in wondrous ways. It is an order out of chaos, which sustains us, test us, show us the face of failure and reward us for our persistence.   

To What End??

Sooner or later we all ask our self the reason of our existence. After a long hectic day of which each and every hour was painful, every step laboured; we always question the reason of our suffering. Why do we suffer needlessly when all we want is to follow our hearts wherever it takes us? Why do the choices that life presents to us have to be so out of context that we are left bewildered and uncertain that the path laid in front of us is indeed the one that we seek?   

It is said that we live to find happiness in this world. For this sole purpose we follow our dreams, fall in love and take risk in life to achieve what we must to full fill our destiny and leave our impact in this world. But each of us at some time of our life question the path that we are forced to tread to find happiness. We all ask our self the same question; ‘To what end?’  

 We all question our faith, our beliefs in different scenarios to ascertain that we follow the most righteous and worthwhile path. Some questions are asked openly, some secretly in silent corners of the house.

It is in human nature to seek acceptance from the people with whom we indulge our self. Our whole life is spent earning our place in the society or so as to say to mingle with the crowd. This is reason why even when it is clear to us that the way is improper even immoral in the eyes of our soul; we don’t dare to heed that voice. For it will make us stand out in the crowd. We feel that we would be seen as an outcast by our own friends, family and the society most of all. Such is the greatest travesty in this world that a soul is lost in hailstorm of life for those who never cared or were not even aware of his existence.       

 It is very infuriating sometimes to follow the customs and traditions with which we must oblige our society. From the time we are born we’re confounded by the endless web of human subtleties.  As we grow up and as our understanding grows we are more baffled by inexplicable human nature and bizarre turn of events which takes us to roads beyond our wildest imaginations.  

Such is the way of life as complex as any mathematics algebraic problem if you don’t understand the question; at the same time simple enough if you know the trick. Life has always been difficult to understand with so much happening around us. It is easier to get lost here than to reach the end of the road. The trick is to keep walking.    

I Am The Master Of My Fate; I Am Captain Of My Soul

Last couple of days have been quite exhausting not physically but mentally. I find it satisfying sometimes to ponder questions which have significant impact on our life. Lately my mind has drifted several times towards impending questions of my future and what it may bring to me.

Can you truly picture what you want to be in future? It is a basic question but to understand it in depth you must answer it with honesty and integrity of your soul. Don’t cloud it with the thoughts of materialism that is inculcated in everyone’s mind from birth. Let your heart decide what path to tread and only then you’ll see what was always in plain sight but is hidden from you.

So once again back to my original question:

Can you truly picture what you want to be in future? Is it like a single image? or Is it like a list of possibilities all of which bear resemblance to your likely future? If so, Is there anything invariable in each of your dreams or picturisation of your future self?

Think about the time when you would realise your dream and answer my question. What is that you wish to be around yourself when you reach there? For a moment keep aside the wealth, position, recognition or awards that you desire and answer my question. These might still be important but they are not what should be used to define your life.

Everyone has preconceived notions about what future would look like. But do you truly believe that you could predict knowing the endless snags which lay in store for you out there.

I was getting frustrated pondering such endless list of questions which seemed unfathomable for the time being. So I took a break and started watching one of my favourite movie Invictus. The film tells the inspiring true story of how Nelson Mandela who after spending 27 years in jail and then becoming the first black president of South Africa, joined forces with the captain of South Africa's rugby team to help unite their country. Mandela shares with François a British poem, "Invictus", that had inspired him during his time in prison. I will share it with everyone for it truly stirs something deep and profound inside you.

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeoning of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds and shall find me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

In these lines I found peace of mind and understanding about the most important aspect about the future. It does not matter what tomorrow might bring, it is our attitude towards life and strength of our heart which would decide our fate.